Like many people, I’ve had great bosses — and some not-so-great ones.
But there’s one who stands out. Let’s call him Boss X. To this day, when I think about what good leadership looks like, his example comes to mind. He didn’t just manage people; he understood them. And that made all the difference.
When I first started working with Boss X, life outside of work was a whirlwind. My wife and I had two little ones — ages 4 and 2 — and our home was still under construction. We were living in my parents’ basement, trying to stretch every dollar while raising toddlers and holding onto a semblance of sanity.
Dinner was often a blur, sleep was optional, and treats like a white-chocolate brownie from Moxie’s felt like distant luxuries.
In that chapter of my life, balance wasn’t just hard — it felt impossible. And yet, every time I had to ask for a little flexibility — to leave early for a sick child, to handle a daycare call, or to catch my breath — Boss X’s answer was almost always the same:
“Michel, no problem.”
He didn’t sigh. He didn’t make me feel like I was imposing. He didn’t remind me of the deadlines I was juggling. He just said, “No problem.”
Those two words carried weight. They said, I see you. They said, I trust you.
And in those moments, I learned one of the most important lessons of my professional life: empathy in leadership is not weakness. It’s strength.
Boss X’s empathy didn’t make me complacent. It made me grateful.
And from that gratitude came an almost instinctive desire to give back. I worked harder, stayed later when I could, and took pride in delivering excellence because I wanted to reciprocate the trust he placed in me.
There’s a reason people say, “Choose your boss, not your job.”
I didn’t stay because of the work itself — I stayed because I felt valued as a person, not just as an employee.
That’s the paradox of trust and flexibility: the more you give, the less it’s abused.
Companies with unlimited vacation policies have discovered the same truth. When people feel trusted to manage their own time, they rarely exploit it. Gratitude becomes the invisible motivator.
Empathy doesn’t just create compliance. It creates commitment.
Boss X’s leadership style rippled beyond our one-on-one interactions. His empathy shaped the culture of the entire team.
When leaders model understanding, they give everyone else permission to do the same. Deadlines were still met, accountability was still enforced, but there was a human pulse behind it all. We checked in on each other not because HR said to, but because it had become part of who we were as a team.
It’s the same spirit that fuels my work today in workplace investigations and assessments. These processes can often feel clinical or adversarial. But at their core, they’re about people. Real people, trying to be seen, heard, and treated fairly.
I founded Nungisa Law on that principle — to humanize your interaction with all things legal. Because behind every complaint, every allegation, every policy breach, there’s a human story that deserves to be understood before it’s judged.
Empathy isn’t the opposite of rigour. It’s the bridge between fairness and compassion.
It’s easy to mistake empathy for leniency. But Boss X wasn’t soft. He had high standards and expected results. And for some reason, he came to me to handle some of the most complex files he needed to assign. He just understood that excellence and empathy aren’t competing priorities — they’re complementary ones.
When an employee feels understood, performance follows.
Boss X didn’t lower expectations when I was struggling. Instead, he helped me rise to meet them. His “no problem” wasn’t permission to disengage; it was confidence that I could handle both work and life.
That’s the secret few talk about: empathy doesn’t lower the bar. It raises it. How? By unlocking motivation that fear never could.
Years later, when I began conducting workplace investigations and assessments, I realized how profoundly that experience shaped my approach.
Every interview I conduct, every finding I draft, every recommendation I make — all of it is grounded in the same lesson Boss X taught me: be human first.
When someone comes forward with a complaint, they’re often doing so from a place of vulnerability, anxiety, frustration, fear of reprisal. A trauma-informed or culturally attuned approach isn’t just a best practice; it’s a moral one.
Investigators and assessors hold people’s stories in their hands. We ask hard questions, yes, but we do so with care. Because the goal isn’t just to find the truth: it’s to do so in a way that preserves dignity.
That human touch is what turns an otherwise bureaucratic process into an exercise in fairness and restoration.
Managers who want to get the best out of their teams can learn a lot from the “Boss X” approach. It doesn’t require elaborate programs or endless meetings. Just intention and care.
Here are three takeaways that have stayed with me:
At the heart of great leadership isn’t authority. It’s connection.
There’s a fable about the North Wind and the Sun competing to see who could make a traveler remove his coat. The wind blew fiercely, but the traveler only clutched his coat tighter. The sun, by shining warmly, succeeded with ease.
That’s what good leadership does.
You can push, demand, or pressure people into compliance. Or you can inspire them into excellence through warmth, understanding, and trust.
Boss X chose the sun. And because of that, I did too.
Looking back, I see that my work in workplace investigations and assessments isn’t just about resolving conflict or ensuring compliance. It’s about something deeper — restoring humanity in places where it’s been lost or forgotten.
Empathy built me as an employee. Now, it guides me as an investigator, lawyer, and leader.
As a Black investigator, I am sometimes specifically requested when a Black employee or someone of African descent comes forward with a complaint of anti-Black racism. The reason is often simple but profound: there is a belief that I might “understand” in a way others do not, that I might see what has been invisible to others. Underneath that request, however, lies an unspoken expectation: that I will naturally sympathize with them as a matter of fact.
At the same time, my role demands something very different. It requires me to enter the process with a clear head, empathy yes, but also an even higher level of rigor in how I assess facts, weigh evidence, and interpret meaning. That tension (between a complainant’s distrust of a system they feel has silenced them before and my duty to be impartial) is one of the most difficult aspects of these investigations.
The Government of Canada defines anti-Black racism as:
“Prejudice, attitudes, beliefs, stereotyping and discrimination that is directed at people of African descent and is rooted in their unique history and experience of enslavement. Anti-Black racism is deeply entrenched in Canadian institutions, policies and practices, such that anti-Black racism is either functionally normalized or rendered invisible to the larger white society. Anti-Black racism is manifested in the legacy of the current social, economic and political marginalization of Black people in Canada in society such as the lack of opportunities, lower socio-economic status, higher unemployment, significant poverty rates and overrepresentation in the criminal justice system.”
This definition is clear, but applying it in a workplace investigation is rarely straightforward. Why? Because investigators must assess allegations on a balance of probabilities. We do not have a “stereotyposcope” (yes, I just invented a new word) that lets us peer into someone’s mind and measure the weight of stereotypes, prejudice, or unconscious bias. Instead, we are left with the same investigative tools as in any other case: interviewing, documentation, consistency testing, and credibility assessment.
The challenge is that racism is often subtle, cumulative, and pattern-based. One remark or one decision might not cross the line by itself, but when taken together with other behaviours, a picture emerges. And that picture can have real, lasting impacts on someone’s career, dignity, and sense of belonging.
When investigating anti-Black racism, it may not be enough to simply follow the same checklist used for other workplace conflicts. Investigators dealing with such matters may benefit from being especially attuned to the nuances of systemic bias and cultural context. Here are four ways that I think could strengthen that lens:
This post is not meant to divide or shame. Society as a whole is wrestling with the ongoing reality of racial discrimination and the work required to move forward. In investigations, when faced with claims of anti-Black racism, we have a duty to “call a spade a spade” if the facts support that conclusion.
You don’t need to be Black to do this work well. What is required, I believe, is strong emotional intelligence, cultural awareness, and a willingness to recognize subtle patterns that others might miss. The nuances matter — they are often the difference between dismissing a complaint as “unsubstantiated” and acknowledging a reality that has been overlooked for far too long.
If you are an HR professional, lawyer, or investigator, I encourage you to sharpen your lens. Read widely. Listen deeply. Ask whether the tools you rely on are enough to uncover bias and discrimination when it’s hiding in plain sight. And most importantly, make sure that your process builds trust, especially for those who have historically had very little reason to trust it.
Imagine you’ve been employed full-time since November 2021 but are uncertain about your current employment status after your employer stopped providing work since December 1, 2023. Although your health insurance benefits are still active, your employer hasn’t provided an official letter of dismissal or a Record of Employment (ROE). If you’re considering applying for Employment Insurance (EI) benefits today, July 10, 2024, you might wonder: can you claim the benefits owed to you since December 1, 2023? How far back can your claim go?
In such cases, the concept of antedating your claim comes into play. According to the Digest of Benefit Entitlement Principles, Chapter 3, Section 2, antedating allows you to backdate your EI claim to an earlier date, provided certain conditions are met.
Per section 10(4) of the Employment Insurance Act, your request to antedate a claim may be allowed if you:
If you meet the qualifying conditions at a later date, the antedate can start from that date.
To justify an antedate, you must show "good cause" for not filing in a timely manner. Jurisprudence has defined good cause as doing what a reasonable person would do to understand their rights and responsibilities under the Act. Reasons for good cause may include:
Good cause must be consistent throughout the delay period, though different reasons can apply at different times.
Sometimes, good cause may exist only for part of the delay period. In such cases, antedating can only be applied to the earliest day for which there was good cause, provided this period immediately precedes the day the initial claim was made.
The claimant (you) carries the burden of proof to demonstrate good cause for the delay. Credibility is key, and in the presence of any doubts, the claim may be considered unproven.
Disqualifications or disentitlements do not prevent an antedate if other conditions are met. This includes periods of disqualification for reasons such as severance pay or pension payments.
Remember that to qualify for EI benefits, you must meet the following criteria:
Here’s a step-by-step approach to apply for EI benefits and request an antedate:
While it is possible to claim EI benefits retroactively, it hinges on proving good cause for the delay. Immediate application, comprehensive documentation, and a thorough explanation of your situation are crucial. For further guidance, visit the Digest of Benefit Entitlement Principles, Chapter 3, Section 2 for more details on the antedate policy.
If you have further questions or need assistance, feel free to reach out. Taking swift action and ensuring detailed documentation can significantly enhance your chances of successfully backdating your EI claim.